Preacher Claims He Has Received Divine Message

HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This article is intended as satire and uses the tools of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule in the context of contemporary politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues. by Solaiman Hassanin ‘23 In today’s society, few issues are more debated than the role of religion in each individuals’ life. One noble preacher has taken the … Read More

(Not) Exactly News: January 2022

HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This article is intended as satire and uses the tools of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule in the context of contemporary politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues. by Ella Scher ‘23 What the ‘Girlboss Empire’ Means for American Men When President Joseph Biden abruptly resigned, the world was stunned and saddened, then fearful, as … Read More

Crossword Answers

March 2023: Spring Cleaning January 2023: New Year, New Me!   November 2022: Fall Into a New School Year! Archived Crossword Answers (Jan-May ’22)

Bathroom Door Creates Privacy Utopia for Sherwood Boys

HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This article is intended as satire and uses the tools of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule in the context of contemporary politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues. by Ben Schoenberg ’24 Sherwood has implemented measures over the past few weeks to provide Sherwood boys with privacy and refuge for disadvantaged groups in the school … Read More

Polar Bears Are On Thin Ice

HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This article is intended as satire and uses the tools of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule in the context of contemporary politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues. by Liam Trump ‘24 Let’s look at their stats: 1,300 lbs., nearing the 10 ft. mark when standing on their hind legs. Their sheer strength allows them … Read More

Not Exactly News: Zuckerberg To Create Robot Workers

HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This article is intended as satire and uses the tools of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule in the context of contemporary politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues. by Ella Scher ’23 In a press conference last weekend, Mark Zuckerberg, the clearly human Facebook CEO, announced his grand plan to replace all of his staff … Read More

Seatbelts Represent Communism

HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This article is intended as satire and uses the tools of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule in the context of contemporary politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues. by Ben Schoenberg ’24 The requirement and enforcement of seatbelts in cars is the greatest form of oppression in America since McDonald’s stopped selling supersized meals. Mandatory … Read More

Disney: The Force Awokens

HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This article is intended as satire and uses the tools of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule in the context of contemporary politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues. by Liam Trump ’24 It is no secret that Disney is the best company making movies today, but are they really doing enough when it comes to … Read More