My Solution to the Debt Crisis

by Declan Rooney ’25 At some point you may have Googled how much the United States is in debt and been swamped by a tsunami of depressing stories about how the U.S government is 34.4 trillion dollars in debt which is going to cause a global economic collapse. Fear not concerned citizens, for I have cooked up three delicious ways … Read More

Democrats Rig Super Bowl for Taylor Swift

by Declan Rooney ‘25 The Kansas City Chiefs won this year’s Super Bowl, beating the favorited San Francisco 49ers 25-22. The victory was the third consecutive upset win for the Chiefs in the playoffs, after taking down favorites such as the #2-seeded Buffalo Bills and #1-seeded Baltimore Ravens. They did all of this despite an underwhelming season, going just 12-6 … Read More

Man from 18th Century To Run for President

by Jordan Costolo ‘25 In the course of a human’s life, usually nearing its end, it becomes necessary for him, or her (but most likely him), to gain as much power over others as possible to ensure a legacy that lasts for all time. Although much has changed since my youth in the late 1700s, I, Sir Cornelius Jefferson, shall … Read More

Sophomore Helps Others (To Help Self)

by Thien Dinh ‘26 When sophomore Joel Green was young, like many other kids, he didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life. However, that all changed when he was on his way to middle school and noticed a man with dirty shoes and disheveled hair. Green was compelled to assist him with whatever he could, giving him … Read More

Stanley Ruined My Life

by Declan Rooney ‘25 When I waltzed my way into Target on a fine afternoon last month I expected nothing but a quick run to pick up a quality bottle from a very popular brand called Stanley. Stanley has been praised for its high quality bottle the “Quencher,” which I wished to procure for my various hydration needs. But as … Read More

How to Write a Hit Song

by Katie Ng ‘25 Many people aspire to write songs and become a pop star, but they don’t realize that songwriting is not easy and never was. You may want to learn how to write songs but may not know where to start. Here are some tips to consider. First, use curse words. Profanity will make the song more relatable. … Read More

Sherwood Implements Brand New Ten-Step Plan To Take Back the School

by Declan Rooney ‘25 With a new school year comes new rules for students to follow. Last year, the zoo we call Sherwood High School was rampant with off task behavior such as smoking, skipping class, and in-class phone usage. That is why the school needs a shepherd to put these animals in place, and I think I’m just the … Read More

Sherwood Expands Parking Spots for Students

by Jordan Costolo ’25 Attention Juniors and Seniors: It has come to the attention of Sherwood administration and staff that the student parking is not the best. The parking lot is disorganized, rampant with students taking other’s assigned spots, filled with bad parking jobs, and littered with spots that are in direct sunlight or on uneven ground. So to respond … Read More

Mock Trial Ready To Do It for Real This Time Around

by Mauricio Altamirano ‘24 By popular demand, the Mock Trial Club (MTC) has returned to Sherwood. In the courtroom where people’s lives are at stake, emotions run high and people may say things they later regret. Imagine what might happen if a couple of utterly inexperienced lawyers are thrown into the mix. The club’s return can be credited to its … Read More

Boredom Defeats Students

by Jordan Costolo ’25 As the school year comes to an end, students have run out of things to do to pass the time during class. Teachers have run out of material (and busy work) to give, leaving most students high and dry in the way of entertaining themselves. With oneweek of school still remaining, this has students scrambling to … Read More