by Katie Ng ‘25

Many people aspire to write songs and become a pop star, but they don’t realize that songwriting is not easy and never was. You may want to learn how to write songs but may not know where to start. Here are some tips to consider.

First, use curse words. Profanity will make the song more relatable. If you end up writing an album, it have a parental advisory and at least half the songs should contain explicit content. Most singers don’t use big vocabulary in their songs, and only Taylor Swift is allowed to use big words like “clandestine,” “machiavellian,” “crestfallen,” and “contrarian.” Second, interpolate another song. Interpolation means drawing inspiration from an older song or artist by taking that work and incorporating it into your work. Every pop song sounds like at least one other pop song, and it isn’t considered plagiarism as long as you don’t outright copy another song. Additionally, there is no such thing as stealing or owning chord progressions! Third, write about your ex. Call them a lying traitor and say they were a horrible person who sucks and has many problems. Be overdramatic and exaggerate what you are singing about. Make sure to not name drop but to also leave enough details so your fans can figure out who the ex is. That way, they can rally against that person which will boost your popularity. If you don’t have an ex, pretend you have one. Fourth, use your money to obtain access to a recording studio. Any producer will be more than happy to record your angry pop rock song. Lastly, if you end up completing an album, make sure the album contains a sad song, an angry song, a song about jealousy, and a song about someone you know experiencing abuse. Pop albums seem to have each of these kinds of songs these days.

If you are still unsure on how to write a song, consider following these simple step-by-step directions.

Step 1: Purchase a rich sounding piano or alternatively a $400 keyboard and turn it on. If you can’t obtain either, download Garageband on your phone or tablet and open up the Keyboard Touch Instrument, which allows you to play different keyboards like a grand piano and an electric piano.

Step 2: Come up with a song idea. The only reason you want to write a song is because you are moody and need to get something off your chest.

Step 3: Play that keyboard passionately.

Step 4: Sing over your keyboard composition from the bottom of your heart, like someone pulled you apart and you are absolutely broken.

Step 5: Post the song on YouTube or TikTok to promote it. Clearly, YouTube and TikTok are the path to fame.

With these tips and steps, creating an unforgettable song or album is easier than ever and you will most certainly achieve fame and musical stardom.