by Naomi Bang ’23

I hate cold showers. So why do I take them (almost) everyday? Because jumping into freezing cold water at 7 a.m. has taught me to embrace “the flinch,” a term author Julien Smith uses to describe that moment of panic and doubt right before you do something uncomfortable.

Like Smith describes, I have the tendency to run away from things that scare me. I’ll struggle alone on a math problem because I don’t want to ask the teacher for help, postpone getting my license for two years because I don’t want to crash a car, and won’t ask that person out because, what if they don’t like me? Every time I face an opportunity that’s scary, I flinch and shrink back into my comfort zone, but those opportunities are scary because they could be life changing. I could get a boyfriend, drive anywhere I want, granted I might not become the world’s greatest mathematician, but you get the idea. The discomfort passes in an instant, and the confidence I gain on the other side is worth a little flinch.

It took me a long time to learn this, and I’m definitely still figuring it out. The thing is, facing challenges is not a one time deal. You can’t do it once and have the skill mastered. One year, I’m seven and jumping off a diving board for the first time, the next thing I know I’m taking the SAT to get into college. I think being the best version of myself is not a fixed state but me constantly pushing my boundaries and testing my limits. If I could give a pep talk to freshman, sophomore, and especially junior Naomi, I would tell her to take more risks even if that means feeling uncomfortable or looking a little stupid.

Someone once gave me the advice to just go and grow. Sometimes I just have to go before I think I’m ready. I can make myself the person I want to by taking a risk; I don’t have to wait for everything to line up for me first. Right now, I’m about to enter a completely new era as I start college in the fall—that’s a big flinch—but I’m not afraid to jump straight into it. It’s just like a cold shower … right?