HUMOR DISCLAIMER: This section is intended as satire and uses the tools of exaggeration, irony, or ridicule in the context of politics, current trends, recent school events, and other topical issues.

by Aviv Klayman ‘24

The first home game for the Ravens on September 18 against the Miami Dolphins ended disastrously after the Dolphins scored 29 points in the 4th quarter to win 42-38. If the Ravens hope to avoid future embarrassments on their own home field, they must be able to find someone who can inspire the crowd like Poe could. Because of his proven fire and flair to ignite the people of Baltimore, the Ravens organization should be searching for a replacement for the beloved mascot as fast as possible. Since the injury, the Ravens have been holding tryouts; however, as of now, no replacement has been chosen yet. The damage of the delay is already being felt.

Tragedy struck the city of Baltimore after team mascot, and icon of the team, Poe, suffered a devastating injury during the final preseason game for the Ravens and has been placed on IR. During the halftime show, Poe participated in a game with other mascots and kids. On one play, Poe immediately grabbed his left knee after being tackled to the ground. Everyone at M&T Bank stadium collectively held their breath, as Poe laid on the ground for 2 minutes. Finally, Poe was carried off the field to a standing ovation from the crowd. 

Four days later the Ravens’ official Twitter account posted a video in which head coach, John Harbaugh, finally commented on the matter. “We will find a replacement,” he said. “We’re going to go to work on that right away. We’re going to turn over every stone, scour everywhere and find his replacement. We’re going to get right into evaluating our options, and see where we go next and if we can find somebody to replace Poe.” 

Poe has been a staple for the purple and gold for nearly 25 years. As much as it pains to hear that he will be replaced, that’s how the cookie crumbles in the NFL. It will be difficult for Harbaugh and the Ravens’ organization to find anyone close enough to Poe’s abilities and what he was able to do on and off the field. Since his rookie year in 1998, Poe has made the Pro-Bowl 10 times, and has been a consistent threat for other teams to watch out for. Every performance that he shows to the loyal fans of Baltimore is extraordinary. The connections he has with the fanbase are so crucial for the team. His consistency and overall greatness have been top-tier for decades. He is a generation talent and a definite lock for the Hall of Fame.