by Carlee Malone ’20

In an age where progressive media champions people of all body types, with figures like Lizzo making headlines and history, and companies like American Eagle committing to a body-positive model network, it seems like the era of size-two, celebrity-inspired norms and restrictive diet culture could meet an end. However, as body positivity swells across media, the plague of teenage body insecurity still permeates, prevalent as ever.

Although a newfound appreciation for people with bigger bodies has emerged, many teenagers still force themselves to skip meals, overexercise, or take on restrictive diet measures to attain a thinner body. But, why is it such an alarmingly silent issue? It’s almost normal to hear a friend say that they “need to lose 10 pounds” before a beach vacation. It’s not uncommon for someone to casually mention that they haven’t eaten all day… all the time. They’ll compare weights, complain about their imperfect stomachs, and curse a body that doesn’t meet the painfully high standards set by their insecurities. Despite this, open discussion about eating disorders and hyperfixation on appearance is practically nonexistent.

So many teenagers, across genders, silently suffer and stress over body image. How can something so superficial and subjective be so commonly torturous and polarizing? Why are issues of self-worth and insecurity shielded from the mainstream? Women of all sizes fear that openness about these struggles means invalidation: some are deemed “too skinny” to complain about the way they look, while others are “too big” to possibly have an eating disorder. Some dread judgement, dodging labels that would reduce them to attention-seekers and drama queens. Many men feel confined to never come forward with an issue considered so “feminine,” suppressing their feelings of inadequacy to those who are more muscular, more toned, and generally more akin to what they perceive as desirable. In a world where these problems are suppressed, erased, and practically labelled as obsolete, those who suffer under the weight of their insecurity and self-hatred often have to do it under the impression that they are alone, never to be understood, and unable to be helped.

When will we learn? Insecurity doesn’t have one face, one body type, or one symptom. The restriction and self-harm we see on TV, movies, and in the media is just familiar enough to fit inside of the confines of what we’re willing to accept. Where is the uncomfortable truth? The truth that shouts that not only are these struggles painfully widespread, but that they instill anxiety, stress, depressive episodes, and feelings of isolation and worthlessness within so many. The revolutionary truth that so many people–so many teens–live this way and can’t find the strength to be open and recover. 

We need to stop being silent. We need to stop being so complacent in the degradation of our bodies that we never change. We need to stop invalidating and overlooking, and start caring and sympathizing. The most revolutionary thing we can do–what will make conversations start and stigma disappear–is to speak up, share our stories, and make efforts to not only give help, but to get it.

The hardest thing in the world to do, besides asking for forgiveness, is asking for help. Fortunately, help can manifest in whatever way you need most. Maybe you just need someone to listen to you rant (or cry), or a workout buddy that will help you make your lifestyle not just healthier, but happier too. Maybe you want to try to learn to love yourself and your body as is, and you want the people you love to support and guide you on that journey. Whether your struggles are as severe as crippling eating disorders or as minimal as infrequent lapses in confidence, you deserve a support system. And whether you need a recovery, a restart, or just a reply, it all starts with one tremendously daunting (but, assuredly achievable) first step: ask.