Cartoon by Helen Schmitt ‘15

By Allie Pino ’15

Now that the winter season is bringing cold weather, many students are getting ready to start what they have been planning for months: human hibernation. All kids want to do during the chilly times is eat, sleep and watch new episodes on Netflix.

Human hibernation does not begin at birth, but studies have shown that teens are the most common group who participate in this activity. The earliest age reported to have experienced human hibernation was a six-year-old boy in Maine. His parents found him in his room everyday with a fort of food surrounding his bed, blankets wrapped around him and his computer screen lit up. It has been said that every time the parents went upstairs to try to get him out of his room, it was so dark in there that the only way they knew he was inside was by the sound of his growling at them to, as the little boy put it, “leave his cave.”
There are many different stages of human hibernation, but the two most common are the “Hyperphagia Transition” and the “Fall Transition.” The “Hyperphagia Transition” is a period of excessive eating and drinking to fatten for hibernation. Teens have been known for stocking up on high-calorie foods. Jordan Rim, food industry veteran and President of Fat Bars stated, “We look forward to the end of the year because that is the time when sales on our treats go through the roof. Our most popular foods during this time are the Jumbo Filled Creamed Cakes, Chocolate-Chunk Sweet Sprinkled Brownie and Doughnut Medley.” During this stage, teens with unlimited food options eat 5,000 to 8,000 calories per day. If they are denied water and food during this stage, they become dehydrated and must utilize muscle for energy.

“Fall Transition” is a period after Hyperphagia when metabolic processes change in preparation for hibernation. Teens voluntarily eat less, but continue to drink to purge body waste. They become increasingly lethargic, resting 22 or more hours per day. Active heart rates fall from 70-100 beats per minute to 50-60 beats per minute, and sleeping heart rates fall from 66-80 beats per minute to less than 22 beats per minute.

Researchers have found that as a person ages, human hibernation will not have such a tremendous effect as it does on young teens. However, 34.6 percent of adults over 25 have not been able to quit human hibernation. If teens keep up this trend, we all may be faced with the decision to grow a thick coat of fur.