Man Takes No Issue with Government

Robert Jones flashess two thumbs-up to express his persistent and profound pleasure with the job Congress has been doing.

Robert Jones flashess two thumbs-up to express his persistent and profound pleasure with the job Congress has been doing.

By Leo Corman ’15

Robert Jones, a 43-year-old Rockville native, is an ordinary American man by all appearances. He works in finance, has two kids and loves to watch football. Inside, however, Jones harbors a stunning secret: he is extremely satisfied with the current state of American politics. He counts himself among the only 15 percent of Americans who approved of Congress in 2014.

According to Jones, what many Americans view as gridlock and inefficiency, he sees as patience. “I’m a man who prefers quality over quantity,” said Jones. “I appreciate that Congress is willing to take the time to really make sure they do things right. It’s fine if this is one of the least productive Congresses in our nation’s history because I at least know that every law they do pass will be well thought-out and effective.”

Jones identifies as an Independent because he admires both parties so much that he often can’t decide between the two. He is impressed by the Republican party’s consistent and single-minded devotion to one purpose (hindering President Obama at every turn), but he respects Democrats’ flexibility as well, as demonstrated by their willingness to abandon their former stances and their President in the name of political self-interest.

In addition, Jones finds an interesting positive amid concerns about politicians’ prioritization of their own reelection over improving the country. “The fact that they pour so much time and money into keeping their seats in Congress shows they really love their jobs,” observed Jones. “I’m glad the people at the top truly enjoy what they do—I know I’d never make that much of an effort to cling to a job that I’m clearly not qualified to carry out.” Jones also agrees with the Supreme Court’s equation of money in politics with free speech, considering outrageous campaign spending a fundamentally American right, arguing, “Some people just talk a lot louder than others.”

Furthermore, Jones takes no issue with the growing predominance of style over substance in the political sphere, even as it allows politicians to hide their astonishing ignorance behind a thin veil of vague rhetoric and buzz words. “I’m a firm believer that what you don’t know can’t hurt you, so I think it’s a good thing that politicians don’t want to hurt me,” said Jones. “They say ignorance is bliss, and bliss sounds pretty darn nice to me,” he added. Jones countered assertions that a group of mostly privileged, older white males might not be best suited to represent the voice of a diverse nation by saying “that’s how the Constitution was made, and it’s not like we’ve had to change it since then.”

When explaining why members of Congress receive exorbitant compensation for accomplishing next to nothing while millions of unemployed Americans suffer, Jones responded, “I think that shows why these are the men and women that are leading our country. These people have managed to find a job that pays them not to do anything, while some can’t even get a job. That’s the American dream.”